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Tips For Dating After A Divorce

April 30, 2008

Tips For Dating After A Divorce
By Pauline Go Platinum Quality Author

Dating after a legal separation or divorce may sometimes be packed with nervousness, over cautiousness or a cynical attitude. After divorce, if you are interested in dating, please consider it as your first date. Treat your date with care when you went out on your first date ever.

Coming out of a relationship can be a miserable time and to overcome the memories of previous relationship while dating may be difficult. Here are some useful tips for dating after a divorce:

Learn from your past relationship:

Learning from mistakes in a previous relationship may help to choose a new date. It is better to stay away from any new relationship until you are ready. In other words, give some time to yourself and think about your past relationship’s issues and learn from your mistakes. This will help you find a date that is more compatible.

Find your match on the internet:

Online dating services are no longer a hub for singles, graduates or college students. Quite interestingly, a recent study has shown that more and more divorced people prefer online dating and romance sites than matchmaker agencies to find their perfect match.

Avoid talking about your Ex:

Okay, so you are dating somebody and having a chat at a restaurant. Please avoid talking anything which involves your previous relationship. This means no talking about your ex-husband or wife. After all the last your date wants to know is how great or disgusting your previous partner was.

Obey the rules of the road:

If you are in a car with your date, be courteous to other drivers and obey the rules of the road. Even if you are being overtaken by some cab, act as if nothing has happened. Your date may get paralyzed with fear if you try to take some revenge by chasing down other drivers who have offended you in some way. She or he will surely not want to see you again thinking you are a psychopath!

About Author:

Pauline Go is a professional writer for many dating websites. She also writes other great articles like French Kissing Techniques, Find Diamond Engagement Rings, How To Avoid Emotional Cheating In Marriage,

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Pauline_Go

How To Get Over Being Dumped

April 30, 2008

How To Get Over Being Dumped
By Pauline Go Platinum Quality Author

If someone has dumped you for your mistakes or for reasons unknown, one thing is certain, it is not possible to get over the breakup that easily. You may experience feelings of rejection, betrayal, anger, and sorrow. However, here are some ways to get over being dumped and lead a more positive life:

Stop questioning yourself:

Blaming yourselves for the breakup will not help. After being dumped most people search for some logical reason for the breakup and this leads to blaming oneself for it. This is a sign of a lower self-confidence. Be confident enough and think in a positive manner. Perhaps the person whom you were dating did not match your personality.

Stay busy:

Controlling feelings after being dumped is very important, but not easy. You will have to determine what the best solution is for you in this situation. Substitute your emptiness by surrounding yourselves with people who have a positive attitude and like you for what you are. Staying busy is the key factor of avoiding remorse or any emptiness. Go to a gym to work out, use a punching bag to punch off your anger and pain, or spend time with people who love you and care for you.

Avoid contacting the person who has dumped you:

This is the most common mistake many people commit. If the person who has ended the relationship does not care for you, why should you? The pain is temporary and will eventually fade with time. Just take out the person from your life as if it was some kind of a nightmare. You have to learn to move on with your life

Consider meditation:

Yoga does wonders in shaping one’s life; even overcoming grief from a broken relationship. Through the principles of yoga, meditate at least 15-30 minutes everyday as it will help you relax and calm down.

About Author:

Pauline Go is a professional writer for many dating websites. She also writes other great articles like French Kissing Techniques, Successful Speed Dating Tips, Body Language When A Guy Likes a Girl.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Pauline_Go

Why Are Women Attracted To Bad Boy?

April 30, 2008

Why Are Women Attracted To Bad Boy?
By Pauline Go Platinum Quality Author

Why are women attracted to bad boys? This question has been asked a number of times without a satisfactory answer. The reason why women are attracted to bad boys could be due to their rough looks and the excitement that comes from associating with them. Some people believe that women are attracted to bad boys because of the aura of selfishness and self confidence. Whenever women see a grungy looking person on a motorbike, they feel sexually attracted to him as a sense of adventure flows into their minds.

Dating bad boys is quite unpredictable. He may take you out to a restaurant in one minute and the next minute have a rollicking and risky time on his motorbike. Some women find a safe and comfortable ride quite boring.

Women feel quite sexy while dating bad boys. The main reason behind this is that bad boys do not care whether a woman likes them or not. Now compare this to a so-called nice guy who is always desperate to please his lady and can come across as clingy and wimpy.

Breaking rules is common among bad guys and this automatically makes them attractive to women who are thrilled with the unpredictable and exciting behavior. Whereas good guys are predictable and this can get boring.

Women who love bad boys actually get subconsciously attracted to their self confidence and in some ways or the other think that their offspring will survive in the race to acquire success and wealth. In this way the gene factor also plays an important role in attraction to bad boys.

One thing is certain; being bad gets ten times more attractions than being good!

About Author:

Pauline Go is a professional writer for many dating websites. She also writes other great articles like French Kissing Techniques, Successful Speed Dating Tips, Body Language When A Guy Likes a Girl

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Pauline_Go

The "Nice Guy" And The Halo Effect

April 30, 2008

The "Nice Guy" And The Halo Effect
By Michael W.

Halo Effect - The Reason Nice Guys Lose With Women

So today I happen to have seen this movie that REMINDED me just how INSANELY tough it must be to be a guy who is living without knowing the full deal about attraction, about women, and about the way human emotions work.

I don’t know if you’ll believe me, but the honest truth is that sitting in the theatre, this movie pissed me off! You see, the movie is called "Forgetting Sarah Marshall". And in this movie, is a dude who I thought EVERYONE in the theatre would NOT be able to relate to, because to me, his behavior seemed so lame, pathetic and ignorant.

Even though this movie is a comedy, the reality is that it would not work if the audience felt this guy was CRAZY. The movie works because the reality is that there are in fact so many guys who can relate to his perspective.

And then it hit me. You see, I USED to think similarly to this character in the movie!

It’s only because for years and years now, I have been so immersed in a different way of thinking and behaving that this stuff NOW seems so absolutely crazy to me. And the fact that this character’s type of thinking in the movie does not seem absolutely absurd and crazy- the fact it seems identifiable as something that could happen - is HORRIFYING to me! It shows what massive confusion and ignorance about human emotion has spread throughout our society. I want to clear this whole topic up! Honestly, I want to make that type of behavior, that type of thinking, EXTINCT!

So what was this behavior? In the movie, this woman who is supposed to be super hot, (reality check, is that there are many girls like her around, HONESTLY, but the way most guys think, guys go crazy for any girl that is remotely attractive and shows SOME interest in them, which all comes from scarcity style thinking) and she suddenly dumps him after four years.

He goes CRAZY desperate, he becomes a total needy wreck, he tries to win her BACK, he ABANDONS his whole life, loses passion for his goals, self-esteem plummets, etc.

Now, the first thing that was glaringly obvious to me, is that no woman on Earth "suddenly" dumps a guy.

This is all part of the myth, the nightmare myth, that a woman who is this great person, suddenly DROPS a guy out of the blue, she becomes this uncaring unfeeling person, etc.

What ACTUALLY happens is that a guy ends up falling victim to what is known as the HALO EFFECT.

The halo effect is when humans see people who are attractive or celebrities or both, they tend to think these people are BETTER than other people - more NOBLE, more honest, more intelligent, etc.

It’s total emotional HOGWASH, but it happens so often and even today with all this knowledge even educated people often FALL for it. So much so that you may notice whenever you see criminals in court, they dress as well as they can to try to influence the judge or jury to come to a verdict that says he or she is innocent.

Well, at least this disturbing movie SHOWS this, it shows it in a pretty intelligent way, although I wonder if every guy GOT it.

What the movie shows at first, are his MEMORIES of this woman. He keeps on TORTURING HIMSELF by remembering the "fun times" they had together. He keeps seeing her smile in his mind, he keeps remembering when they got physical, etc.

And of course, this makes him more and more sad, depressed, and frustrated!

Then, his best friend tries to help him out, tries to set him straight, and then TELLS him something STRAIGHT UP:

"Hey man, whenever she was around us, and I saw her with you, she was pretty much a bitch."

I’m paraphrasing, but that’s what he said, in a heartfelt way. His friend is trying to HELP him, but his friend is also truly being HONEST.

So what does the guy respond with? He gets angry at his friend for him saying this. How dare his friend say this about his "great" woman! So he tells off his friend, he tells his friend that this girl was better than his friend’s girlfriend!

Does this make any sense? The girl that dumped him, was better?!

Well, the truth is that unless you are trained and developed in the ways of attraction, pick-up, and full inner game, this kind of thing is very realistic, because what happens is that our mind plays TRICKS on us. It’s the halo effect, in full effect!

It’s not just that this guy felt his girlfriend was beautiful, he also felt she was somehow great, a great person, a wonderful person, someone he was going to miss! He didn’t say that his girlfriend was hotter, he actually said she was "better"!

And yet, this is exactly how many guys might feel in real life in similar situations.

All because of the HALO EFFECT.

If the guy truly honestly felt that it was just a woman’s looks that were superior, he would not stand for the abuse.

The problem is that the halo effect makes a person feel that the beautiful person is somehow not only superior in looks, but also in personality and intelligence, etc., etc.

And this is what millions of guys experience all the time.

In fact, the memories we trigger when we are under the halo effect are often FALSE MEMORIES! You see, emotions are insanely powerful things. We tend to feel first, and then we rationalize those feelings as being appropriate feelings. We give reasons for those feelings, reasons that feel right!

In reality though, the feelings usually have nothing to do with the reasons we give for them! In fact, very often, the reasons we give for the feelings are not only wrong, they are horrifyingly wrong, they are the farthest thing from the truth!

So, for example, because the guy feels attraction and feels she is good (all due to the halo effect), he then has selective memory, to only remember the good things, no matter how tiny they were (such as her "smiling"! I mean who does not smile ever? And what the heck is valuable in a smile, it could be she is smiling for totally selfish reasons!)

Not only that, if a guy feels strong enough about a woman, he may even create memories that never existed, he will WARP the past into it being something more special than it was!

Our brains do this because we think there is no way that we can feel so good about something or someone that was actually not good!

Eventually in the movie, he slowly starts to regain some accuracy in his memories, and it’s no coincidence that these memories are triggered only once he regains his self-esteem!

Suddenly then, he starts to remember all the sick and twisted things she did to him!

And this brings me to a massive point:

The whole problem in the first place started because he himself was not feeling the kind of self-esteem that every man deserves to experience. He was doing work that he hated, he had vague dreams of creating a rock opera that he was not putting into action, and his whole attitude toward his own life sucked.

The only thing he had going on that seemed cool was this chick who was an actress, decently attractive, etc.

And so she became his only source of self-esteem.

Again, not just because of her attractiveness, but because the HALO effect ALSO made him view her as smart, noble, good, virtuous,

special, etc. And so having her in his life made him feel that he was special by association. He needed a self-esteem prop so badly (because he was ignoring his true inner self which is where self esteem should really come from) that he was oblivious to the reality that indeed she was a shallow, selfish, emotionally and intellectually void beeee-yotch!

He needed her so badly, only because his own reservoir of self-esteem was running on EMPTY.

He had nothing INTERNAL to base his own self-esteem ON.

And even when his friend was telling him to get to work on that rock opera, all he did was say he couldn’t because he was heartbroken. Yet, by ignoring his self, his own identity, his own self-esteem plummeted FURTHER, leaving him even MORE vulnerable to the halo effect and selective memory and being desperate for her.

And even when he slept with many women, it didn’t help, because he still felt empty about himself inside. He still felt she was the special one, because for years and years, he had unwittingly brainwashed himself into believing this!

It’s only when he meets another woman who is emotionally more intelligent than he is, that things begin to slowly change.

This new woman, well her self-esteem is INTERNALLY driven. She is not all about having "celebrity pet care centers" or about

being famous and glitzy, she does not need to have validation from everyone around her to be happy, and she doesn’t need to be rewarded for being a good and happy person, she does it because she FEELS GOOD doing it. Her own self esteem is SKYROCKETING.

And she encourages HIM to grow this way as well. She even devises a sly but loving method of getting him to FORCE HIMSELF

to take action on his dreams and goals. All this stuff helps him REALIZE that what he was REALLY SEARCHING for all this time was not his ex-girlfriend, but HIMSELF. He had LOST HIMSELF before he even MET the abusive woman, so he was a perfect target for optimum destruction for the abuser. And yet all those years he was HAPPY to be with her, he felt she was the GREATEST thing that happened to him.

And yet, the new woman, who he is attracted to as well, cannot do MAGIC. So a certain amount of emotional growing has to come from him and him only. This is his real mission. Yet, he at first fails this mission, because when the ex who dumped him comes running back to him after her new boyfriend cheats on her (and after her new boyfriend can’t take her selfish behavior because it gets in the

way of him continuing his own selfish rotten behavior) and after her TV show gets cancelled, he actually makes the horrible mistake of becoming weak and fooling around with her a bit even though he stops half way and regrets it horribly.

However, it’s still enough damage to cause the new awesome woman he’s met to lose respect for him. Which makes sense, because really what he has done has shown her that his self-esteem is SO WEAK, that HE IS WEAK.

This is why I HATE it when "nice guys" get associated with characters like the guy in the movie.

This guy doesn’t lose the initial girl because he’s NICE. He loses her because he’s too weak to see that he shouldn’t have been with her in the first place and he’s too weak to see that he needs to develop himself INSIDE first!

This isn’t nice.

This isn’t good.

It’s pathetic.

When a woman says "Are you strong enough to be my man", she doesn’t mean are you a bad boy!!!! She means, are you a good guy and STRONG about it, are you a good man who is STRONG about his goodness, or will he need validation and will he need to pretend to be a pimp or playa or alpha idiot who is so scared inside that he can’t even tell the difference between an amazing woman who treats him well and a woman that treats him like garbage.

It’s only when he FULLY REALIZES and FULLY GROWS inside, when he become strong enough to have NO DOUBTS about what really is important, is he able to truly win the girl who is beautiful and a fantastic person as well.

So, this movie wasn’t actually bad at all. But it was a WAKE-UP call to me that reminded me the things I take for granted now are only because I was lucky enough to LEARN all this stuff so that this movie seemed ABSURD to me. And yet the film only touches the surface of what is a mountain more knowledge that every man must know. I want there to be a day when this movie seems ABSURD to EVERY MAN ON EARTH.

And that will ONLY happen if every man on EARTH gets the message and is willing to put in the WORK to DEVELOP the internal skills and external skills regarding attraction, self-esteem, emotion, and charisma.

Don’t let yourself be like the guy in the movie who is so IMMERSED in the ILLUSIONS that are destroying him, that FIVE YEARS go by and even his BEST FRIEND cannot help him when he is pleading and trying so hard to wake him UP from the insanity.

Michael, better known as The Dating Wizard, http://thedatingwizard.com, is an expert in the field of dating and human sexuality. His credentials for getting clients results are constantly proven in the real world- he was recently the official men’s dating coach for The Toronto Star’s "Get A Relationship Challenge"- Michael took this group of shy men out to meet and attract women at lounges, where the men achieved stellar results- http://thedatingwizard.com/media.html#TorontoStar

By steering clear away from gimmicks, manipulations, and pick-up lines, Michael shows how to develop an effective, charismatic, and genuine approach to meeting women anywhere, in a way that sparks attraction and develops the deeper bonds, trust, and connection for long term success. He will show you how to unleash the most charismatic parts of your natural identity that women not only find magnetic, but also find disarming so that they can open up their real selves with you. This will allow you to build the kind of foundation and trust that will prevent the disastrous "games" that ruin almost all relationships.

Michael was recently interviewed by best-selling author David DeAngelo for David’s "Interviews with Dating Gurus" series, (April, 2008), and Michael also served as a special guest speaker at the Double Your Dating "Man Transformation" seminar in April, 2008, in Los Angeles.

Sign up for Michael’s free e-newsletter which gives away TONS of valuable insights on dating, meeting women, and relationships, by going to http://thedatingwizard.com Michael’s programs include: The Seduction Mastery Apprenticeship CD Program, The Dating Wizard eBook, Live Seminars, Weekly Bootcamps, and Private One-To-One Consultations. In addition to his degrees in education and political science, Michael also has an extensive communications background as a speechwriter, advertising copywriter, and screenwriting instructor.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Michael_W.

Is A One Night Stand More Acceptable Than A Long Term Affair?

April 30, 2008

Is A One Night Stand More Acceptable Than A Long Term Affair?
By Doug Young and Christina Young Platinum Quality Author

Cheating is cheating. However much you dress it up and try to argue your corner, if you’ve cheated in your relationship or marriage and for whatever reason your partner or spouse now knows about it you’ve put a rift between you that is going to take a lot of working out.

‘But I’d had a few drinks, I didn’t really know what I was doing and it didn’t mean anything’ is your argument. ‘It’s not as if I’ll be seeing them again. What’s all the fuss about?’ Funnily enough your partner may not see it that way.

So is a one night stand less of an offence than a long term affair? There is no definitive answer to that because it depends on your individual viewpoint. And it could be that your partner has a different view on it to you.

So often couples have this sort of discussion ‘after the event’. And the ‘event’ doesn’t have to be infidelity. It may be about flirting. One person might be as upset by their partner or spouse flirting with someone of the opposite sex as another would be about their significant other having a one night stand.

Problems so often arise because couples have never shared their views on this sort of thing. They have never set their boundaries which is so important in any relationship.

Have you ever asked your partner or spouse whether they were unfaithful in their previous relationships before they met you? If not why not? If they we’re unfaithful before statistics reveal that they are more likely to do it again than those who’ve never strayed. Don’t you think that it’s something you should know early on in a relationship?

So many problems in a relationship, particularly in the case of infidelity, stem from poor communication. So often we find it’s easier to sweep things under the carpet than discuss them openly, and so often these issues jump out and bite us later on.

If you’re in that position and need help here’s what you must do next…

Sign up straight away for our free reports Infidelity - How Can You Prevent It? and How To Live And Deal With The Aftermath Of An Affair which are part of our free 8 part mini series on Surviving infidelity in your relationship or marriage.

Doug and Chris Young are Relationship Coaches who really can walk the talk, having survived infidelity in their own marriage and come out of it much stronger http://www.askdougandchris.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Doug_Young

Critical Fears Inhibiting Women From Sexl Fears Inhibiting Women From Sex

April 30, 2008

Critical Fears Inhibiting Women From Sex
By Vikky Brown

Various psychological barriers exist why women would shy away from sex. Fear, guilt, anxiety, inexperience and a whole lot of other factors. On thing is certain. One thing is certain; whatever holds her back also prevents both partners from enjoying a truly compelling sexual encounter. Of course not all sexual encounters can be tagged remarkable, but if our sex lives routinely falls short of remarkable, one thing’s for sure, we quickly get bored with our partners.

Everyone understands what fear is. By far the worst factor that hinders us from trying out new things, venturing out into new territory, coming out of our comfort zones is fear. Up till now we’ve already lost a lot through fear. We know what it is and dread it. For a woman, when it comes to sex, fear is an ever present enemy.

What constitutes a woman’s greatest fear in sex? What would make her lock up and deny anyone of her precious spring of passion?

Of course there are certain fears associated with sex that are common to both males and females. The fear of STD’s is one of such. The fear of pregnancy is another. These are well understood by most people and people will only make mistakes concerning these in a fit of loose passion or carelessness.

What are the deeper fears that lie underneath the surface? What are those fundamental unseen fears that gnaw at the hearts of women? We’ll examine these in detail.

The most fundamental fear most women have to deal wit is fear of loss of self esteem. For most women new to sex, it can be a real challenge to let go. It’s just in their psyche to feel that all a man desires is what’s located between their thighs. And when he gets that, that’s all. To be candid, the greatest fear all humans dread is the loss of self esteem. It’s not peculiar to women. It’s just that when it comes to sex, this fear takes on a different dimension. Of course the fact that most men go on to boast about their sexual exploits has not helped matters. No woman loves to be a statistic of any man’s sexual conquest. This account for all the fronts and hard-to-get attitude most women put up when faced with male admirers. Their thinking is that somehow their value to the men would be buoyed and the men would look past any sexual gratification lying along the way.

You usually do not hear of cases of abuse and battering before a couple starts having sex. But few sex encounters down the road you begin to hear of all sorts of things. It’s little wonder then why women are always on their guard.

Another thing that locks most women up is fear of poor sexual performance. Some women are pretty damned scared to find out the truth about their partner’s sexual performance that they work up any type of reason to delay their first encounter. A lot of women are really scared about the prospect of discovering that the person, with whom they’ve invested so much emotionally, falls short of their night - in bed, that is. For quite a number of women, knowing that their partners are sexually unsatisfactory or incapable could mean the end of the honeymoon. So what some women try to do is ‘enjoy the whole game before that first encounter. After that it might well be game over’. Of course few women will hang on in the face of poor or declining sexual performance from their partners, but such women are really few and far between.

Finally, there’s the fear of rejection. Truthfully, a lot of women have deep personality problems especially regarding their appearance. This fear is so strong that some women are moved to think that once a man has his way with them, he” certainly reject them. So they lock up. This fear becomes very strong when the male in question seems to be getting a fair deal of female attention. Sometimes this fear can lead some women to capitulate to sex, but with certain kinds of women sex becomes virtually impossible.

Of course, some of these fears are unfounded, but the onus lies on the man to see that it his women feels secure, loved and adored to make for a healthy relationship.

Understanding the secrets to sexual health and fulfillment is one of vikky brown’s most intense passions. He regularly provides powerful information on this subject on his blog. Meet him at http://www.malewatch.wordpress.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Vikky_Brown

Which is Sweeter Between You and Your Girl - 5 Minutes of Sex or 1 Hour? Part 2

April 30, 2008

Which is Sweeter Between You and Your Girl - 5 Minutes of Sex or 1 Hour? Part 2
By Peter Davids

Study Her Body Very Well.

A woman reacts to every touch on her body in someway. It is up to you to really study her and observe how she reacts to every one of your touches. Start from the very top and go slowly down. Ask her how she feels with every one of your touches. She will let you know which one she enjoys the most and which ones she doesn’t. You will be surprised at the discoveries you will make about her body as you both explore everything.

Stay a While With The Exciting Zones of Her Body

When you discover the zones of her body that excite her, don’t be in a hurry to go to other parts. Take your time over those parts to really touch those places. Stimulate her as much as you can in those areas. A woman loves it when you really focus on getting her aroused. You are helping her to enjoy the sexual act as much as you want to.

Use Your Full ”Arsenal ” to Excite Her

Don’t just think that it is only with your private organ that you can give a woman pleasure. You can do it with some other parts of your body too.

For instance, your hands are a very great weapon of sex if you know how to use it well. Start out with rubbing her body, to tickling her, then on to touching sensitive parts of her body, and you will realize that your hands are very potent in the sexual act. Your mouth and especially your tongue are also very useful in having great sex. Use your mouth, not to talk with her alone, but also to touch her arousal zones.

Visit http://www.achieversideas.com for more information on how you can manage your anger and achieve success. You can also get free information on how you can improve your life in 24 hours at http://www.opportunitiesglobal.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Peter_Davids

Are Women Attracted To Cavemen Or Gentlemen? Here’s The Truth

April 30, 2008

Are Women Attracted To Cavemen Or Gentlemen? Here’s The Truth
By Matt M

Most men don’t know what women want. Most women don’t know what women want. Sure, conscious choices are obvious. Things like, "I want a man who is funny" and "I’d like to date a guy who is confident" are pretty standard. But let’s face it, if every woman’s criteria for choosing their partner were as simple as these examples, we guys really wouldn’t struggle that much to get chosen, would we? But we do. We really, really do. Most men bumble through the process of attraction and-if they get far enough-seduce like blind men without sticks or guide dogs. They’re forced to feel their way through the whole thing, trial and error style. So let’s cut to the chase: what are the real rules? What do women actually care about subconsciously? Here’s the run down.

To really get to the heart of what happens between men and women when attraction (or repulsion) takes place, you need to rewind a few million years. I’m deadly serious: the roots of attraction lie in the groundwork laid down by our ancestors-our great, great, great, great…well, you get the idea. First you need to understand what the situation was (and still pretty much is). Women produce one egg per month. Men produce about 200 million sperm per day. Things aren’t balanced or anywhere near equal. Because women only produce one egg a month, they have to be very careful about which men they allow to get close to them and even more careful when deciding which guy (or guys) will be the chosen few: the men who get to ‘inseminate’ them. This is all unconscious behaviour. This isn’t controlled by the woman’s (or man’s) conscious mind.

So, women are the ones who choose the men. They check them out, watch their behaviour, assess their status and value, then make their choice accordingly. But that doesn’t mean men are powerless in this game. Far from it. You see, back in the days of mammoths and sabre-tooth tigers (and millions of years before, to be honest) there were two main types of man. The caveman and the gentleman. Let’s define both. A caveman is a rough and ready, playboy style guy. His goal is to inseminate lots of different women in a short space of time. He has the tools to achieve this: he is strong, motivated and a tribal leader. A gentleman is less animalistic. He is reliable and helpful and LOYAL. He’s the guy you want around your kids, but not necessarily the man you want to FATHER your kids. Do you see the distinction? Women want a strong, high status male to inseminate them (because of his tough, refined, prolific genes). But they don’t want to be abandoned after becoming pregnant by this guy-because he will inevitably go off to beat some other caveman over the head, take his woman and impregnate her too. So when they’re pregnant, they want the caveman to ’settle down’, chill out and become a loyal father. But leopards don’t change their spots. True tribal leaders can only be tied down for so long. But the women don’t want a loyal man who’s there to help out and stuff, but is also fairly meek and weak. So what do they want? They want a COMPROMISE. A perfect mix between a caveman and a gentleman. They want a tribal leader with a loyal and reliable personality. Fast-forward to today, right now, right here. Do women really need a man to raise their kids? No. Do they need a tribal leader to beat up his male rivals on their behalf? No. Do they still have the evolutionary programming that makes them want these two things and more? YES. Hell, yes.

So how do you adopt an attitude and aura of a tribal leader and a ‘gentleman’ in this modern age, a time of bars and nightclubs, parks and parties? A time of equal opportunities between the sexes. You follow a system. You use a formula. You become the guy women see, assess and realize is a man all women see as attractive and all men respect and look up to.

Mr. M.
GrandMaster
BlackBeltSeduction.com

Get your free Email course from Black Belt Seduction and learn how to attract and seduce women the Black Belt way.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Matt_M

Marital Money Pits - Not Your Potion

April 30, 2008

Marital Money Pits - Not Your Potion
By Francis K Githinji

Many people say that love conquers all but i am finding this phrase questionable since many couples are not enjoying financial harmony in their marriages. Most arguments between partners constitute of marital money pits. According to a recent research, couples fight more about money than even sex or household chores. If you look at it keenly, money is the real source of conflict in many families. It is unfortunate that financial fights point to other problems which lead to major marital crisis. The intimate relationship between couples is affected due the generated hard feelings. Many women will reason like "why should i submit to a man who can’t even provide!" Here is some insight from two experts as to what leads to the dollar spats.

Money matters to most of us because we view it as an indication of how wealthy we are. It has a symbolic nature in our lives as it represents security, power, approval, self worth and social standing. In the research, the respondents were of the view that how much or little money they had controlled their relationships. The most common balance sheet revolves around debt and spending. Our individual perceptions about money can be traced back through our upbringing. As a result of these marital pits can be overcome intellectually but not emotionally. It is always wise to deal with money issues before they reach emotional.

Different styles of dealing with money issues spell different levels of marital money pits. In cases where money conflicts are severe, communication break down was observed to be the problem. Couples who do not talk about money at all and those who talk about it have no idea about how to do it effectively. Not talking about it is a bad habit that ruin your marriage. Money is the source of every evil so people should be ware of it. Many couples do not know how to talk respectively, they will end up fighting or hailing harsh words towards each other. However acquiesce to keep peace is not a better option either. It is a signal that the couple has given up on searching for financial harmony. They relinquish control thinking that it is a loving compromise but it is not.

In order to succeed in putting marital money pits at bay, you have to learn that being business-like in a relationship does not spoil your romance. You should take your marriage as a serious financial partnership as well as a romantic relationship. It is always wise to make strategic plans about your every investment for them to be profitable. As in every business, keep track of foreseeable bumps in the road and deal with marital pits before hand. I believe that dedicated couples should have two meetings in a week to talk about financial matters. Avoid only talking about it when there is a blow out. Your meetings should be brief and interesting. Set the agendas and limit the duration of the conversation to under one hour. This deters any tendency to wander off topic. When you are mentally and physically exhausted a debate about overspending can easily turn into a fight about accusing each other of irresponsibility and selfishness.

Francis K. Githinji Is A Online Dating Expert. His Latest Project The Marital Money Pits Shows How The Power Of Online Dating Can Be Harnessed Internationally and With Great Success, Or You Could Post Your Valued Comments On His Blog At The Marital Money Pits

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Francis_K_Githinji

Mothers In Law - What You Can Do With Annoying Ones

April 30, 2008

Mothers In Law - What You Can Do With Annoying Ones
By Shevach Pepper Platinum Quality Author

We have seen them on TV, read about them in books, and even laughed at the situations that these characters get into but there is nothing funny about the situations that arise from annoying mothers in law. In fact, having one such mother in law can actually put a strain on your martial life and ultimately your relationship with your spouse.

There are however, a few things that you can do in order to do your best with this type of mother in law. While some mothers in law behave this way naturally, there are some that are acting this way because of a particular problem.

How to deal with mothers in law’s problems.

• The first thing to do is talk with your spouse. It is possible that your Mother-in-law is exhibiting previously seen behavior. Your spouse will be able to tell you if this is the case and then give you advice regarding how best, from experience, to handle the situation. Try to do this in a way that is not going to result in an argument between you and your spouse.

• Talk to your mother-in-law; more importantly listen to what she has to say. It is quite possible that the issues can be easily taken care of and all it takes is a little patience and the willingness to listen.

• Do not get into an argument with your mother-in-law. It does nothing beneficial and can actually create larger issues. Do not be a push over and allow her to walk all over you but do not go out of your way to make an augmentative situation.

• Find out about something she likes and provide her with the tickets or the item. Check with your spouse or even your Father-in-law to see if this is something that will work in your favor. Some people may consider it a nice gesture while others would see it as an attempt to suck up which could create issues in and of itself.

• Take some time to consider if it is really your mother-in-law that is the issue. Often time’s issues from our own childhood can be impressed or imprinted on others. It is possible that the annoying behaviors are not actually annoying but bring up unpleasant things in your past causing the reaction.

• Consider the possibility that she might actually be attempting to connect with you and it is simply not going in the correct way. This happens when people lack the social and communication skills necessary to present what they want in a way that others will understand. This is why it is important to get to know her; you may find that she is really trying to get along with you.

The most important thing when dealing with difficult people is to take the advice of individuals who have dealt with the situation before. Take the time to listen as well. Communication is the key to understand each other. If there is a break in the communication then there can be no understanding. Remember also to maintain a patient and polite attitude, be respectful it can go a long way into making sure that situations stay under control.

Shevach Pepper is the founder and moderator of http://www.valuable-family-relationships-advice.com . Visit there and discover how to save and enhance relationships with mothers in law and other family members. Your whole family will be happy that you did!

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Shevach_Pepper

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